It's not disagreement, but graceful disagreement that makes the world go round. And it is rediscovering that grace that Brené Brown articulates so well in her guidelines for engaged feedback:
" I know I am ready to give feedback when:
Disharmony and discomfort can be grounds for transformation once grace and compassion are in the mix. What we need now more than ever is the capacity to both hear and speak honestly together. Go ahead disagree, but do it in Grace!
- I'm ready to sit next to you rather than across from you.
- I'm willing to put the problem in front of us rather than between us (or sliding it toward you).
- I'm ready to listen ask questions, and accept that I may not fully understand the issue.
- I want to acknowledge what you do well instead of picking apart your mistakes.
- I recognize your strengths and how you can use them to address your challenges.
- I can hold you accountable without shaming or blaming you.
- I'm willing to own my part.
- I can genuinely thank you for your efforts rather than criticize you for your failings.
- I can talk about how resolving these challenges will lead to your growth and opportunity.
- I can model the vulnerability and openness that I expect to see from you."